The Sudanese embassy in Juba, South Sudan has announced that its government in Khartoum – embarrassed that South Sudan was too broke to celebrate its independence anniversary – will donate around half a million dollars towards nation-wide celebrations commemorating the independence of the world’s youngest nation.

Khartoum appears to have felt obliged to come to the rescue after officials in Juba admitted that the government was too broke and too not-in-the-mood for any celebrations.

In a statement distributed and addressed to ‘to whom it may concern’, the Sudanese embassy said it felt saddened that South Sudan – just 5 years old – was so poor it was willing to call off and cancel official celebrations of a day as historic as its hard-worn independence.

“Sudan and South Sudan still have very strong links and are still united in many ways. It was only natural that we extend a helping hand to a sisterly nation in need. We feel that this day is very important to South Sudanese, and as such we are willing to go an extra mile to do all that is in our power to ensure that it happens…”

On their part, officials from the South Sudanese Ministry of Foreign Affairs welcomed the generous and sisterly gesture, saying the people of South Sudan will not forget the kind people who came to their rescue and facilitated the celebrations.

“Our economy is on its knees… partly because of high transportation fees imposed on our oil and so on, but the people of South Sudan will not forget those who came to their rescue just like our sister-nation of Sudan has done…”

Asked by Saakam to name the single most important thing that unites the two countries – Sudan and South Sudan- the spokesperson said “Denial”.

Saakam is still very confused whether the official meant “The Nile” or “Denial”, but we are certain he said the latter.

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